In the end, I’m always the one that gets hurt.
Been 81 days since we parted, 43 more days to go. It should be worth it.
What did I get myself into…
That was because I expect other people to do likewise. And once again, I’ve forgotten not to harbor any form of expectation, especially when I have done so out of my own will.
“Jesus was not sent here to teach the people to build magnificent churches and temples amidst the cold wretched huts and dismal hovels. He came to make the human heart a temple, and the soul an altar, and the mind a priest.” ― Kahlil Gibran
It hurts me because it still hurts you. What good am I actually doing to myself for uprooting everything that strings me back to the past on purpose just so I can be fair to whoever it is to come into my life, when nobody else around me does the same?
Losing a friend because you didn’t want to lie to him, sounds fair to me.
The beautiful thing about distance is that it allows me to appreciate you as an individual from afar.
Checked my email in bed last night only to receive a chain of emails pertaining to the passing of a Professor in a diving mishap. Never had the opportunity to be taught by him but I knew his daughter and to imagine losing someone close to your heart in a blink of an eye, saddens me. It reminded me so much of my grandmother’s incident, perfectly fit in the morning and declared brain dead in the evening, the trauma and scar was too deep and I really can’t imagine how the Professor’s family is coping with the news. Known to be a man of inspiration, he was always encouraging his students to be adventurous in spirit and to contribute back to the society. Why must a good man go just like that? I just don’t understand life anymore, what kind of a plan does a “god” have for a man like him? I don’t see how stripping him away from his family and the society is a good plan. Things like these are just pushing me further and further away from a belief system and drawing me closer to the logic of randomness. It will be silly to think that the latter is just out of laziness and ignorance, because it is a scary thought. Not many people are willing to venture out of their bubble, where they could easily seek comfort, and take an attempt at the big question of the meaning of life. Because when you do, you realise that there is no religion higher than truth, and that too, is the story behind my ink.
“You are my little rock and roll queen”
It’s getting harder and I find myself sleeping my afternoon away just so time will pass faster.